[I/O] Women- Part Rant, Part Rave

DISCLAIMER: If you're a woman, and reading this, Know that my observations are VERY general. DO NOT get pissed with me if you or your gang of friends are not at all like what I've described. REPEAT. DO NOT get pissed with me. AND DO NOT take any of this personally. If you're a female friend of mine, know that I like you and that's why I'm still in contact with you. IF YOU DO GET PISSED, Its really you're own fault. But anyways, if it offends you, my apologies.I'm so very sorray! DO NOT Label me a MCP without reading the ENTIRE blog. Comeon.. I love women. Look up "Scorpio" in Wikipedia. See? I'm an okay guy! Really.


Tia Dalma: 'Tis said that Davy Jones was a man of the sea. A great sailor. Until he ran afoul of that which vexes all men.
William Turner: What vexes all men?
Tia Dalma: What, indeed....
Gibbs: The sea?
Pintel: Sums?
Ragetti: The dichotomy of good and evil?
[Everyone stares at Ragetti.]
Jack Sparrow: A woman.

From Pirates Of The Caribbean- Dead Man's Chest



Heh, Strange how even dull Ragetti got it right....

Man, lemme tell you this... women are simultaneously the source of our greatest strength and greatest weakness. Sam got it bang on when he said "dude, cant live with them, cant live without them" Seriously... what is it about them that causes so much anguish, but still attracts us? heh.. like a moth to a flame.

I've noticed certain "character labels" (sorry, its early morning, left my vocabulary in the bathroom...) in women. Allow me to elaborate.

There' this strange phenomenon called MOODS (no, not the contraceptive mate). Guys, you'd know what I'm talking about na? one moment you're her bestest-special-cutest-etc-etc-friend, and suddenly she's treating you like you're a regular sex-offender... I mean, WTF? A female friend I met recently had the candor to say "You cant expect me to be goody-goody to you all the time, same mood all the time is not possible" My Strong instinct to tell her to go to hell was negated by my appreciation for her frankness.

Well, Women are complicated, evident by this rather accurate diagram..

And they seem to be very proud indeed of that fact... " No one can understand me! No one can understand my feelings" and she looks happier and happier by just saying that...I'm like Adi Paavi, get a grip! Seems like the more people that dont understand you, the happier you are anyways... God forbid if there's suddenly a lack of things to complain about...




Which brings me to the next thing... CONTENTMENT. I'll let the master, Chris Rock, Elaborate.




Well, even if its stand up comedy, and absurdly exaggerated, he's got so many points Bang-On. Man, I love that guy!

Really women, cant you just be happy and content? is it really so darn difficult? Do you just HAVE to find out everything that's wrong in your perfect world and inflict hapless guys with stories that go on and on about how terrible everything is and how you're feeling all moody and stuff... Easy solution, just stop. You'll feel better.Understand that life is imperfect, and sometimes unfair.. we just gotta do our best against it.


The next point is being JUDGEMENTAL . Ever wondered why we guys make friends that last a long time? its coz we're lax about a ton of things. An average guy really wouldn't care if his mate did something wrong. Its all ok, coz we know deep down we're prolly likely to make the same mistake anyways, so why muck up things? Lets go drown in Lime-Mint Cooler or Carrot Juice, and all will be fine in the world.Or, in more severe cases, a couple of fists to the stomach solves everything. I had a pal, Gem, in school with whom I fought (I mean serious fighting, with cursing and punching.. like the barbarian I am) like every week. But after that, we'd game together, and man had so many fun times. I still kinda miss him and our days....the fighting just made it all the more memorable.

But, man o man, when a guy/girl makes a mistake when it concerns a female pal... All hell breaks loose. Angry words, temper tantrums, lots of hissing and tons of recriminations. Dude, Chill... Why screw up a beautiful friendship/relationship for a trivial matter? I mean, come on... cant you just forgive and forget?


Which brings me to the most intriguing aspect.. their AMAZING and IRRITATING MEMORY. Mother of god mate.. he res a typical conversation..

Girl: Hey, Anir! How're You? its been soooo long


Anir: Hey! How're you doing mate? (Mentally searches for who this female is)


Girl: Do you remember.....etc etc etc


Anir: Yeah (beginning to look embarrassed)


Girl: and etc etc etc


Anir: (Now completely clueless)


Girl(in hurt voice): You don't remember me do you?

well, what can I say at this point? I'm pretty much owned... and I'll be reminded week after week how I dont care for friends and how bad my memory is. The latter I can accept. The former? WTF!

To be honest, I'm awed by the small details they remember.... man its amazing! How'd you do that?

Women, please understand that you remember waaay more then we ever can.(unless, for me, the subject happens to be either Biking or Gaming). There's nothing you can do about it, and unfortunately, nothing we can do about it either. Do be more understanding of that... else it'll lead to more heat between you and your male pals... and not of the good variety.


Then theres the COMPLICATION of things. I say this coz it hurts us that you turn something so simple into the equivalent of scaling the Everest naked... Relax.. life is easy, you're the one complicating it.

For example, I, for the heck of it, suggested a female pal of mine to join her Brother's band, coz I like her voice. You'd think it were easy enough, but man o man.... she went on and on about how its not so easy, and how it is so difficult to sing, and how her brother will never listen to her...dude, will you just give it a try? No harm giving it a shot na? But Oh no.. it needs to be complicated and convoluted beyond all limits of human imagination...

I can go on and on... but I'll save it for later... need to rant to my friends too, dont I? :-P

But lemme tell you something, a woman in true love is worth every single bit of all the trouble she gives you. Of course, she'll take absurdly long to truly love you, but then, thats how she is.

After all this, you'd prolly ask, Why do you guys go behind girls? well, besides the Biological programming (Hey, I see Discovery Channel you know... it says we are programmed to be in pursuit of love) There are many things that horribly attracts us to Venusians..

One thing I majorly admire in women is their ability to take all the shit life throws on them. man...all they need to do is cry, hug, and talk about it, and they'll be as right as rain, ready for another round of life's shit. They're made of strong stuff indeed.

And, theres an old saying... "Behind every successful man, is a woman" We men rarely show our weaknesses to our world.. its all the Male ego thing. But a man needs his woman's support as much as she needs him. Only his woman will know him and his weaknesses. Only she will know is personal demons... all men have them, but no one shows it out. You need to get rather deep in to see all that. A woman does it effortlessly.. and Ladies, we just love the way you make us feel like Hercules. Or King Leonidas. Things like grabbing us when you're scared make us feel like a Spartan! Under every guy, theres a Warrior, and its upto the lady to bring it out. She's the only one who can anyways.

Because, once a woman's got a guys heart, he'll damn near do anything to keep her happy (As ol Chris Rock says, even to the point of forgetting his own needs and ambitions. Do see that video) and Woman, do give him credit.

Because, believe it or not, we guys do appreciate the stability and direction a level headed woman brings in our lives.

Because, Damn they're pretty!

Because, under all their layers of fragility, they're really the best part of us.

Because, all said and done... they're wonderful creatures, made by God when he was in a happy mood.

I'll sign this off with a rather unique picture










Cheers Mates!